Scream S01 E04, E05 & E06

They used the jump scare!

Tyler’s head was chopped off inside the first ten minutes of the pilot and has been missing ever since. Good Girl, Nerd and Outcast discover it in the lair of the town’s original mass-murderer and determine the new mass-murderer is an outright copycat. No surprise there, though the set design raised the spookiness factor and made for an entertaining ten minutes of television.

Nerd recovered some mostly corrupted data from the lair. One file is salvagable – eye roll – and features Good Girl and Footballer #1 doing the dirty. The file is then magically accidentally distributed to a ‘list’ of contacts that consists of the entire towns minus the murder podcaster. If we put our investigator hats on we might determine that Nerd did this deliberately… only that he confesses almost immediately. Hmm…
The harrassing phone calls continue – although Outcast explicitly states that the voice manipulation software works on women. That’s something to write home about.

Over an hour of runtime has passed and the kids continue to mourn Nerd’s Girlfriend – the second most likeable character on the show. The show has no murder in episode five and opts for a kidnapping in episode six, subtracting the best plot point the slasher series has going for it. In this still from episode two¬†every character is still alive. The tagline said nobody was off limits!


Nerd discovers the files from Hot Teacher’s class are infected with malware that allows access to people’s webcams, explaining some of the tech magic Ghostface has been pulling off. Nerd and Outcast investigate Hot Teacher and discover Footballer #1 and #2 both have access to the folder.

Footballer #1 and #2 continue to gripe at each other over the morals of extortion. One has money troubles and is peer pressured into extorting Mayor Bitch’s Dad. They wear Ghostface masks and Scream tries to make us believe for a second that these are the series’ killers.

They also spend a lot of time cuddling and talking with their lips about an inch away from each other. Not sure if MTV is doing this deliberately or not, and it’s unlikely they will actually hook up, but I’ve watched too much Glee to not see the signs.

After Footballer #1 and #2 have a falling out Footballer #2 visits Bitch for pizza and snooping. Dramatically they discover Mayor Bitch’s Dad dragged an unidentified body from the trunk of his car and into the house the night after Bitch’s Dad left town.


Everything is pointing towards Footballer #2 as Ghostface, a fact hammered home by the confrontation with his ex-buddy at the gym. Footballer #1 then returns the footage of Mayor Bitch’s Dad before being partially slashed and dragged into the darkness by Ghostface.

Oh, also Good Girl and Handsome Guy have sex.

So to recap:

It will be disappointing if the obvious candidates of Footballer #2 or Hot Teacher are the real deal and outright confusing if it is Nerd or Outcast. And Footballer #1 is now in the clear (for now) after being attacked by Ghostface.

This week put some suspicion back on Bitch and properly cemented Mayor Bitch’s Dad as a suspect but the likelihood is still very slim. It’s not the local cop or the podcaster or Good Girl’s Mum, though there’s the Chekhov’s gun of Good Girl’s Dad still floating about.

At this point Handsome Guy is looking like the best option. Or perhaps, in a twist that would live up to the name, Good Girl could be the killer. In truth it will probably be a killing duo or team similar to the original film.

“Aw, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful mutual tolerance” says Nerd to Footballer #1. Perhaps Scream, but probably not enough to follow onto the confirmed second season.

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